Last week I sent a letter to my local press whining about the council. I'd had a few beers at the time and was in a pissed off mood - plus I emailed them before I had enough sense to look the letter over properly.
Next thing I know, I get an email from the local press telling me how they want to make a feature out of the story.
So what do I do?
As usual I throw myself into it all - with a goddamned photographer coming round to the house to take snaps of me looking all aggravated and pissed off on the phone.
Two pints later - sitting in the pub reading this week’s local press - I’m looking at the kind of journalism this newspaper churns out and thinking to myself: they are gonna make me out to look like a right dick!
So needless to say I emailed them, asking them not to make me out to be some poor little bastard being screwed over by the local council, but rather someone sticking the finger up to a corrupt system.
We’ll see what happens on Thursday. In the meantime, you might as well read the letter I sent and judge for yourself (since it’s obviously too politically incorrect to publish, but relevant enough to make a bloody feature out of)...
Is there no end to the halfwit lunacy espoused by our local authorities?
Several months ago I received a Council Tax demand notice informing me that I was now obliged to pay the remainder of my Council Tax in full simply because the standing order I set up with the bank was paying them on the 25th of each month instead of the 15th.
What is odd, however, is that I had been paying them on the 25th for the last 2 years without any complaint, so why they should whine like spoilt children now was completely confusing to me.
I did, however, oblige their desires by attempting to amend my standing order, only for the bank to make a complete mess of the situation and just keep paying them on the 25th regardless of my instructions.
Needless to say Fife Council subsequently slapped a 10% penalty on my bill and threatened me with a summary warrant if the remainder wasn’t paid in full within several days.
I therefore decided to phone Fife Council, on an 0845 number, I may add, only to sit in a queue for 25 minutes whilst their “very busy” operators dealt with other clients - a nice little earner for Fife Council, I’m quite sure, given that 0845 numbers can be quite costly.
After negotiating a solution to pay a one off monthly amount to my local council office (in order to ensure my contributions were ahead instead of in arrears) I was stunned to be told, upon arriving at the council office, that they no longer accept any payments whatsoever, and that the nearest point to pay at was Victoria Wines on East Port Street. That’s nice, I thought to myself, that the council are taking their sensible drinking message so seriously. Perhaps they think the neds will be more likely to pay their Council Tax if they can pick up a bottle of Buckfast at the same time.
Anyway, the 23 digit reference number that I got supplied with from the woman at the council office wasn’t valid on the off licence computer (nor was it valid at my local post office), so I was back to square one.
In short, I could pay them by debit card over the telephone, but that incurs an additional 1.25% charge, which I’m reluctant to pay given that I’ve already been stung for an additional 10% penalty for being ten days in arrears.
So, instead of Fife Council getting a steady regular payment, albeit ten days late, I’ve opted for not paying them at all since I’m quite sure there are thousands of non-payers throughout Fife who get a lot less hassle than I do.
Perhaps I should quit working altogether, drop right out of the system, have a litter of horrid little smelly children, and sit on my backside watching Jeremy Kyle all day long whilst other hard working individuals deal with the stresses and strains of being law abiding citizens.
I'll let you know how it all pans out, but to be honest I'm not hopeful.
media-underground.net