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28.04.2025
Geriatric X - Memoirs Of A Subversive

I'm working on a new book. Initially the title Geriatric X was dreamt up a few years ago when I had the plan to write a novel, but after having started the project I soon gave up on it having discovered that I utterly hate writing fiction.

Fast-forward to just a few days ago and having just finished proof reading a book about Bill Hicks by my comedian friend James Inman, I felt sufficiently inspired to begin working on another project.

Given that I already had a working title and cover design, I figured what the hell, I might as well modify it slightly and use what I have - after all I might be a geriatric by the time I finish writing it.

Hopefully, however, it won't take that long and I'll have it completed by the end of the year (well, that's the plan anyway). Basically, it's gonna be an autobiographical work and whilst many of you might be questioning why my story is relevant, this snippet from my introduction I think sums up my thoughts on the matter:

"So, who the hell am I to write my 'Memoirs'? Shit, I'm nobody famous, my life is no more interesting than anybody else's - at least, I don't think it is. Have I accomplished something extraordinary? No. Did I do something charitable to help the future of humanity? Absolutely not, I actually fucking hate people. Did I acquire some great spiritual epiphany and now feel obligied to share it with the world? Nope, I'm just some guy that is here just as perplexed and confused as the rest of you.

"So what's the deal, Mortimer? Why are you writing this book?

"If you take the time to speak to just about anybody, they've usually got something of value to convey, some nugget of wisdom, a funny tale or two to tell, a unique way of looking at the world that you would never have arrived at on your own accord. Granted, not everyone fits into this category as some people are just dull as dishwater, but most folks have at least experienced something of interest in their otherwise monotonous drudgery of an existence and it's a shame, I feel, that they don't share it.

"Besides, why do memoirs have to be produced by famous people anyway? I mean, Geri Halliwell has written an autobiography and I couldn't give a flying fuck about anything she has got to say or has done in her life. Then there's new atheist Sam Harris who has written a shit tone of books, and he's an out and out misguided bore with an agenda for sucking the joy and intrigue out of everything (not to mention a pro-Zionist Islamophobic racist).

"No, if being famous is the criteria for writing a memoir, autobiography or any other kind of book for that matter, then I'm afraid your fame doesn't make you any more relevant than anyone else."